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Shut Up and Just Do It
Posted on January 12, 2015

I've done a lot of talking and haven't taken enough action in the last couple of years and I want to change that this year. I talked a little about it in my previous post and it really hit me to day after I read Tyece's post from today called, "You Don't Need Inspiration, You Need Conviction". I've been too busy looking for inspiration instead of just doing it.

Too afraid to put my thoughts out there because I don't wanna seem like bratty, whiney and entitled people I can't stand. I get that things take time. The fact that I dealt with college for four and half years is a testament to that, but I'm past that stage in my life now. There are so many things I wanna do and three years later, I'm still unsure of where to start. Sometimes I wanna go to grad school, sometimes I don't. A part of me wants to leave my current company because I feel undervalued and I'm definitely underpaid, but I don't want to start all over again and risk losing what I have acquired during my time there.

Uncertainty is a bitch. A rude one, but regret is even worse. I would hate to look back five to ten years from now and regret not doing what I want to do now. I want to take better care of my body, I wanna travel, maybe earn another degree or at least get some use out of my first one. I wanna read more books, but my attention span is entirely too short. I'm not big on TV or movies, but I wouldn't mind giving more shows and documentaries a shot, especially those written and/or produced by women or people of color.

Tyece couldn't have written that post at a better time. It's time to stop looking for "inspiration" and just put it out there. It's also time I stop being so critical of myself and be more honest in this space and allow myself to grow as a person and a writer.

As frustrating as it may be, I've been through worse so it's time to suck it up, take the bull by the horns and make 2015 a year to remember.

P.S. While I'm not showing conviction and I just feel like being an inspired bum, I tumble. Check out my Tumblr page especially for MOTC.

I will share miscellaneous things there that don't deserve an entire post over here.

DISCLAIMER: I'm a Tumblr addict so you'll have plenty of stuff to reblog. 

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Hi, 2015.
Posted on January 1, 2015

I have no complaints about 2014 and I'm grateful for everything that has happened in the last 365 days, but I really want to make this year about focus, initiative, and execution. I have a good feeling about it, and I intend to follow through with my promise to myself (and my close friends so they don't cuss me out). I'm getting closer to the big 3-0 and I'm trying to cross my t's and dot my i's.

Less excuses, more effort. I've learned that if you sit idly and watch other people make moves instead of making moves of your own, you'll grow old and wonder about the shoulda coulda wouldas. I learned that lesson in 2014 and it's really time to put up or shut up. I'm feeling inspired and encouraged from all the great things that have happened to all the awesome people that I know and now is the time to make sure some of that greatness is passed my way.

I doubt that I'll be exactly where I wanna be by this time next year, but taking steps to get there is better than taking none.

I don't know where 2015 is gonna lead me, but I'm looking forward to the journey. Here's to prosperity, peace, and last but not least, happiness.

Shoot, a little travel, a little weight loss, and a few more coins ain't never hurt nobody!


MOTC makes Twenties Unscripted's 50 Blogs to Take Into 2015
Posted on December 30, 2014

I'm seriously humbled and honored to have been mentioned in Tyece's list and I encourage everyone to visit her blog here and check out all the other awesome women she featured. You can never have enough reading material. Go get you a piece!

P.S. Look out for some changes around here next year!

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Leave Ariana Alone!
Posted on October 18, 2014

Ariana Grande is an amazing talent. The moment I saw her singing over a Big Pun sample, the moment I watched a video of her rendition of Emotions by none other than Queen Mariah, I was sold. The girl has pipes! Her music is awesome too, but a lot of people focus more on her appearance than her talent. She just turned 21 this summer and she got her career started on a Nickelodeon show.

I've seen a lot of people refer to her as a "little girl", and claim she needs to "grow up" before they can take her seriously solely based on the way that she dresses. 

In a society where women are scrutinized to be sexy and thin, it bothers me to see other women bash Ariana for her appearance. She may not have long legs or wear a C-cup, but she's gorgeous in her own way. Ariana seems to have a sweet spirit and she's uber talented, but people skip over all of that just to talk about her appearance. Some of the very same women who preach about not appeasing the male gaze rag on Ariana's appearance; including women I know. I need all of the pots calling the kettle black to realize you contribute to the misogyny and patriarchy in today's society too. 

She's a childhood star and she's only 21, so of course she's going to explore her womanhood. God forbid any of you have daughters or sisters of your own. Everybody isn't gonna be comfortable being "sexy", so let them be! 

I would rather Ariana rock her ponytail with her little crop tops and skater skirts and blow me away with that voice than see her attempt to be somebody she's not for the sake of pleasing people who don't buy her music anyway. 

If you're one of those women who declare, "Girl Power" just to turn around and downgrade women for not dressing "grown" or "sexy" enough, you're part of the problem and you might as well find a seat at the table with all the boys and men who do the same thing.

Self-esteem issues were serious when I was a kid, but these kids have it ten times worse with cyber bullying, and the pressure of wanting to grow up too fast. Ariana may serve as an inspiration to some of these kids to let them know that you can do whatever you want to do and not have to change yourself to be successful. It may sound cliche, but it's true. If you think about it, a lot of popular artists have had major success and they didn't have a seat at the "cool kids" table starting out. They just did what felt comfortable to them. 

Leave people alone and worry about your own damn insecurities before you start picking other people's lives apart. Pleasantries. 


Throwback Thursday: "I'm Like A Bird"
Posted on September 11, 2014

I'm Like A Bird x Nelly Furtado. Circa 2000.


Throwback Thursday: "Me, Myself And I"
Posted on September 4, 2014

Because it's B'day.  She was 22 in this video. That's mind blowing. Happy 33rd, Motha!

Me, Myself And I x Beyoncé. Circa 2003.

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MOTC (dot com) is three!
Posted on August 14, 2014

It's been three years since I officially purchased this domain. I bought it the day after I graduated from college and coincidentally on my sister's 21st birthday. I was officially a college graduate and I wanted to begin my own brand and solidify that before someone else grabbed it up so I made the move and I'm glad I did. I recently thought about switching the name, but after thinking it over and talking to a couple of my fellow bloggers, I really believe MOTC represents me. 

I initially started this blog in 2010 to talk about beauty and fashion (and I still will), but it's also grown to become sort of like an online journal for me to express my thoughts and various interests. Over the past couple of weeks, I've really been thinking about my life and what I need to do to get to the next level and I really want to put my all into this little space. It may not be much compared to others' sites, but I want to utilize it to share who I am and what I'm passionate about as a 20-somethin' trying to find my way in addition to the things I enjoy.

I decided to toss the whole 'stick-to-a-niche' thing out the window long ago, because I would be doing a huge disservice to myself if I chose to limit myself to one or two things for the sake of site traffic. I love beauty and fashion, I love music, I love talking about how awesome Black women are, and I love writing even though my posts are sporadic. I want to continue to use this space as a platform for those who are like me; who may not know what they wanna do in life, who challenge traditional gender roles, or just want to rave about how awesome Beyoncé is. MOTC is my baby and I vow to take steps towards sharing and most importantly, growing as a brand and as a woman.

I wanna a give a shoutout and thank you to my fellow blogger friends who read my sporadic posts, encourage me and most of all in believe me. Yetti, Kimberly, Shenequa and Tyece, you girls are everything. I aspire to be as awesome as the four of you. 

And last but not least, a big thank you to everyone whose ever read a post, commented, or anything. Your support is everything and it really does keep me motivated when I feel like throwing in the towel. 

I wouldn't call this 'blogaversary' a celebration, it's more of a reflection for me. I just hope my 4th, 5th, and so on will be one for the books.

Here's to celebratory blogaversaries in the future!

- Jai <3 font="" nbsp="">

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"You got the look the Gods agree they wanna see..."
Posted on July 30, 2014

This song is important. The video is even more important. I'm so glad we finally got a visual for this song. It oozes Girl Power/Black Girl Anthem. Only thing that was missing was Solo, but I still love it.  The fact that she paid homage to HBCU culture, Janelle's hair, the T.I. cameo... LOVE!


Why Cohabitation Ain't For Me
Posted on July 23, 2014

Cohabitation isn’t a foreign concept. It’s been going on for generations. Some refer to it as “playing house”, others like to call it “shacking up”. I call it a “Hell Nah” and here’s why.

I’m an introvert and I like being alone. A lot. I enjoy getting together with my friends every now and then and my weekend shopping trips with my mom, but I like my alone time. I need my space. I enjoy lounging in my pajamas, watching Golden Girls on DVD or having an impromptu jam session, party of one.  

I hate when people touch my belongings without my permission. I like when things are done a certain way, but most of all, I don’t deal well with uncertainty.

I’ve never been the type to leap into anything haphazardly. I like to go with the flow, but I also like to plan. Until I’ve met “the one” and we’ve known each other for some time and plan on being married, I can’t ever see myself living with my future significant other.

It has nothing to do with religious beliefs and everything to do with privacy and security. Some people live together because it works for them and their relationship while others do it for the sake of getting help with the bills. If the relationship doesn’t work out, then what happens? If Ricky can’t come up with his part of the rent, what am I supposed to do?

I’d like to think I’m a modern-day woman with an open mind, but that’s one thing I can’t get down with. It’s just not for me. I realize no relationship is perfect, but that’s not a risk I’m willing to take. Sorry, not sorry.

One's living arrangement is none of business if it doesn't pertain to my own, but I personally can't see myself splitting the bills with someone unless marriage is involved. 

At this point, I don't even want a roommate if I can help it. I did it in college for two and half years and that was enough. I would prefer my own space to do what I want and not have to consider someone else's feelings or preferences. Once I move out on my own, I’ll know for sure that bills or paid or if I’m craving a bowl of Talenti gelato when I get home from work, it’ll be in the freezer where I left it.

It almost reminds me of the days I shared a room with my sister when we were kids and I absolutely hated that. There’s nothing like being alone in my own space. On those rainy fall nights, I like to sit in the dark with my window up, burn a pineapple mango candle, put my iPod on shuffle and chill. No worries, no interruptions.

God forbid I ever get married, I don’t know what I’m gonna do then. In the meantime, I’ll just enjoy my candle collections, iPod on shuffle and Golden Girls DVD collection.

Do you live with your significant other or are you contemplating moving in together? How does it work for you and your relationship? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

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Just a 20-somethin' trying to find my way and be great.
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