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I'm Not A Procreation Machine
Posted on April 1, 2017
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Five years ago, I was at my best friend's baby shower and one of our high school friends asked, "Jaida, when are you having kids?" My response was, "No time soon." She dismissed my answer and replied, "Girl, that's what I said too." She was about three months pregnant at the time. That was in 2011 and I was fresh out of college (three months, to be exact). Fast forward six years later and my feelings haven’t changed.


We’ve been conditioned to think we’re “supposed” to get a college degree, get married and have babies by age XX. I don’t want to have kids right now and I’m not going to pretend I do because society says I should.

I'm at a place in my life where I'm still trying to figure things out for myself. All of that goes out of the window once you become a parent. I’ve literally been with my mother her entire adult life. She had me at 22 and my sister at 25 so she had to figure things out pretty quickly. My parents didn’t have a chance to fully focus on themselves until we were grown.

A lot of young people jump into parenthood when they’re not ready and it ends up affecting them and their children. I wouldn’t want that for anybody. Not only that, but I wasn’t put on earth just to become a mother. That isn’t my purpose.

I’m having a hard enough time trying to figure my life out alone. I couldn’t imagine throwing children in the mix. These are my years to be selfish. I don’t have anybody depending on me. I don’t have to take childcare and school districts into account when deciding where I’ll move next. As a single, childless woman, I’m stable for the most part. Besides, there are plenty of children in my life whom I can spoil and love on before sending them back to their parents.

Women are not obligated to have babies. Stop asking women when and if they’re going to have children. Some women do not want children. Some women can’t have children. Stop forcing that responsibility on us. I’m lucky to have parents who haven’t pressed the issue of wanting grandchildren. They understand where I’m at in my life and they respect it. If you want random women to have children so bad, go adopt a child in need of a loving home.


People don’t have to become parents due to some imaginary deadline. Leave people alone and mind your business.

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International Women's Day
Posted on March 8, 2017
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March 8th is our day on the calendar, but I make it a point to celebrate us year-around. We're a force to be reckoned with. Continue to shine. Continue to make your dreams come true. Don't let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do. Be fierce. Be soft. Be hard. Fight for what you want. Cheers to some of the women that I love and aspire to be like: Beyoncé, Solange, Viola Davis, Shonda Rhimes, Kerry Washington, Taraji P. Henson, Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, Janelle Monáe, Zendaya, Yara Shahidi, Aja Naomi King, Ciara, Cardi B, Jourdan Dunn, Jackie Aina, Jessica Lewis, Whitney White and many, many, many more! Girls are everything. Women are everything. I love us and you should too. If you want to see non-stop girl power, be sure to follow me on Tumblr. 







Foolproof Skincare For Dry Skin
Posted on November 27, 2016
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Does your skin feel tight after washing your face? Do you get flaky in the fall and winter months? Have you tried organic ingredients in hopes of combatting the dryness and you're still flaky like a biscuit? 

If you answered “yes” to one or more of these questions, you are not alone girl.


I decided to try high end skincare products for the first time last year around this time and my skin has improved so much since then.
The Vitamin Hydrating Mist gives an extra boost to the skin and I love the smell! 

After a few nights of using these products, my skin felt totally different. My skin has definitely improved over the past year thanks to FAB's products.




If you have dry skin like I do and haven't been able to get a routine down that works, don't fret! Sometimes it may be the products you’re using or your routine needs to be tweaked. Using a gentle cleanser along with a good serum and moisturizer have been my saving grace. I absolutely love that I got to try the moisturizer and night cream in the set, but you can definitely find a moisturizer that can be used in the AM & PM. Fresh Beauty's Rose Deep Hydration Face Cream is awesome for that.
I finally bought my Foreo Luna Mini 2 after a year and some change and I'm so glad it did. This device paired with my FAB Face Cleanser is a God dream. My skin is even softer than before. I definitely recommend investing in one.
Start out with a simple lineup of products to keep your routine simplified, then you can slowly begin to add and take away products depending on what's best for your skin. I really hope this helps.
If you have dry skin and you've stumbled upon some awesome products, let me know in the comments. I'm always looking for new stuff to try.
In the meantime, check out some of my favorite "dry skin approved" products below!

After a couple of trips to Sephora, I decided to pick up First Aid Beauty’s Peace, Joy & FAB Kit last year during the VIB sale. This gave me a chance to try multiple products from the same line without breaking the bank and I got at least three full-sized products in the set.

Pro-tip: If you’re looking to try new skincare products, now is the time to rack up! There are all kinds of holiday sales and everybody is selling holiday sets, which will give you the opportunity to try different products without breaking the bank.

If you have dry or sensitive skin, I highly recommend trying First Aid Beauty's products.

My favorites are the Face Cleanser, Ultra Repair Hydra-Firm Sleeping Cream and the Ultra Repair Cream.  The Ultra Repair Cream has a whipped consistency, but it’s thick enough to combat dryness, especially during colder months. This cream can be used all over the body, but I only use it for my face. It also has oatmeal in it, which is awesome for dry skin. If you’re looking for a face cleanser, this one is perfect! It’s extremely gentle and it won’t leave your skin feeling stripped, which is why it's officially a holy grail product for me. I also love the night cream. After a few days of using the night cream before bed, I noticed how moisturized my skin was the next morning.











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First Time Renter's Guide
Posted on September 5, 2016
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I moved into my first apartment almost five months ago and I wanted to share the things I learned along the way.  If you’re moving out on your own for the first time and you’re not sure where to start, I hope this provides you with some insight to make your transition smoother.


·       First and foremost, create a budget. Be mindful of your monthly income and go from there. Be sure to include your current bills along with your future bills (cable, utilities, etc.) 

      Save. Save. Save.  If you don’t already have a savings account, now would be the time to start one. Most banks only require $25 to open an account. Open an account and deposit $25 (or whatever you can afford) into your savings once a month. 

Do your research. You can check out sites like ApartmentGuide.com, Apartments.com, ForRent.com and of course good ol’ fashioned Google, which is how I found my apartment complex.
·       
      Be sure to schedule an appointment to tour your prospective place.

While you’re on your tour, be sure to ask about your desired amenities. Will water, trash and sewage be included in the rent? Are there fees for having a pet or using the carport and garages on the property?

Ask about cable bundles that may be mandatory.  Some complexes may have an agreement with your local cable provider.

If you want a pool, gym, fireplace or any other amenities, be sure to inquire about those things during your tour.


·       Read the fine print before turning in your application.

The first complex I applied to wouldn’t refund my security deposit after I canceled the move-in date when I got approved for my first choice. That could’ve been $150 back in my pocket, but I was on a tight deadline to find a place and didn’t read the fine print thoroughly. Even if you think the rental office explained everything to you, be sure you read over everything for yourself and ask any questions before you submit your application.


·       Be persistent. My complex doesn’t have a waiting list so everything is first come, first serve. They weren’t able to tell me when a unit would be available right away, so I literally had to call, email and drive to the rental office to make sure I had first dibs on a place by my desired move-in date and I got in!

·       Inspect your future haven. If there’s any damage to the place (i.e. dirty carpet, chipped paint, etc.), be sure to take pictures and inform your rental office before you sign the lease so you’re not held responsible when you move out. You wanna be able to get that security deposit back, girl!

Hire a moving company. If you’ve saved a decent amount of money and you don’t want the hassle of having to round up family and friends to help you move, hire movers. I was only moving my bedroom furniture so I used You Move Me. They were reasonable, friendly, and quick. They even gave me a plant as a housewarming gift! You can always research other moving companies in your area. Most companies charge by the hour and may also charge based on distance, so keep that in mind.

Do not procrastinate! Moving little things from Point A to Point B was a pain towards the end because I was just ready to get it over with. Not to mention, we were moving off the third floor. Any small things such as clothes bins, etc. that can be moved by the company you hire, have them throw it on the truck and save yourself some time and energy. If you get your keys before your actual move-in date, take things to your new place little by little to lighten your load towards the end.

Last, but not least, enjoy your new home! Make it your own and make it a place you can’t wait to come back to after a long day.




Letter To My Younger Self
Posted on August 13, 2016
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August 13, 2006 (Age 18)

So you’re done with high school and you’re starting college in a week. I know you wanted to go away for school, but you have some maturing to do. You’ll get to leave, I promise. You may feel stagnant sometimes and things might get tough, but you’ll get through it. Besides, you’ll be busy as hell three years from now in a totally different environment. All of this is temporary. Just knock these prerequisites out and keep it moving.


August 13, 2011 (Age 23)

Well, you did it. You graduated from college. You thought the day would never come, but it’s here! You were a totally different person when you came to TSU at 20-years-old, but you’ve learned valuable lessons and made lifelong friends in the process. When you think of this place, think about what it took for you to get here and never take it for granted. You gained much more than a degree.

Even though you matured and learned a lot about yourself, college was still a safety net. It’s gonna be scary and stressful trying to figure out what’s next, but do yourself a favor and relax. Listen to Dad. He may sound insensitive now, but you need to go home. You didn’t have a plan mapped out for post-graduation so the best thing for you to do is go home. Go home and enjoy not having to do anything for the first time in five years. You’ll be able to eat home cooked meals again and the days of sleeping in an extra large twin bed and dragging your clothes to the laundry room to wash clothes are done! Appreciate the little things.

Be prepared for growing pains. Be prepared to feel lost. You’re gonna argue with Mom and Dad because parents don’t get it. Take everything as a lesson and apply it in the future so you know how to navigate it or help someone else navigate it. The same way you had to fight to get your degree, you’ll have to fight even harder to find your place in the "real world". Oh yeah, start a savings account. You'll need it. 

And last, but not least, do not put deadlines on your life. Don’t stress yourself out because you aren’t living in a condo in NYC by age 25. We’ve been trained to think we have to set all these unrealistic goals by a certain age in order to be “successful”. Five years from now, you won’t even wanna move to New York. It sounds crazy now, but trust me on this. Be thankful for the things you have and continue to work for the things you want.

Last thing, don’t become complacent, because that’s not who you are. Be good to yourself and stay encouraged.


Love, Jaida






Just a 20-somethin' trying to find my way and be great.
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