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Relax, Relate, Release
Posted on July 5, 2015
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I’ve fell victim to seeing what other people were doing and admiring it, but getting discouraged all at the same time because I didn’t feel like I had what it took to be successful.

For a while, I didn’t wanna write anymore. I didn’t wanna be a journalist anymore. I didn’t want any part of it anymore. I wanted a workaround instead. I’ve been overwhelmed, stressed and discouraged and I’ve allowed it to get in the way of something that I’ve always wanted to do.

It’s part of the reason while I’ve been going back and forth about grad school for the last three years. It’s also part of the reason why my blog isn’t where I would like it to be. I’ve allowed my fear to psych me out. I’ve allowed my full-time job to be the priority and doing nothing when I get home every night. While I’m trying to find out where to go next, I’ve put this space on the back burner.

I never feel like what I have to say is relevant enough to speak on. I just didn’t want to be another cliché blogger with a bunch of cliché think pieces and other crap I don’t care about for site traffic. Yeah, I want site traffic, but I want it for the right reasons. I want people to come here and be able to relate. I want people to come here and leave with gems. 

There’s nothing wrong with working a 9-5. Hell, I work a 9-5 right now, but I don’t want that to be my story.

I figured out my passion when I was 16-years-old and I thought it would come to fruition by the time I graduated from college. Well, shit happens. It all depends on how you handle what life throws at you. I’ve known this all along, and I can give other people the sermon, but when it comes to myself, I come up empty. It’s time that I practice what I preach. I know what I’m capable of and it's time to get to work.

“Be the change you want to see in the world.” – Mahatma Ghandi

It may be cliché, but it’s true. I won’t know until I try. If I look up and years have gone by and I sit wondering about what I could’ve done and should’ve done, I’ll never forgive myself. I looked at my post from New Year’s Day and shook my head because the year is halfway over and I’ve got nothing to show for it. I’ve still got time to make 2015 count so I’m going to do all I can to make better use of my free time.

I don’t know where this is gonna lead me or how it will turn out. I don’t know if the people that claim they support me will actually support me. I just have to have faith in myself, go with my gut and do it. I’ve been doubted in the past. I’ve been told what I shouldn’t do or couldn’t do, but I did it anyway.

I’m scared of the outcome, but I’ll never know if I don’t put forth the effort to be better.
It’s time to be brave and stop talking about my dreams and doing all I can to make it a reality. It's so hard to get down when you see your peers doing well and you feel stuck. I've allowed that to hold me back for too long and I've decided to put an end to it. If they can do it, I can do it. Do it in your own time. Do it because will make you a better person. Everyone loves recognition, but don't do it solely for recognition. Do it because it's something you believe in. 

To those of you who read my little ol’ blog, thank you. To those of you who have given me words of encouragement, thank you.


I’m not big on posting every little thing I’m thinking or doing online, but just know that you can expect change around here.

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True Life: I Met My Fave On Valentine's Day
Posted on February 17, 2015
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I'll be honest, I was ready for the day to come and go after all the hoopla surrounding the pushback of tour dates and the stress of finding shoes and just figuring out everything for the actual day. I'm a bit of a perfectionist and I'm particular about things so I just wanted it to be an awesome day. The day of was nerve wrecking because Live Nation is awful and they need not ever handle meet & greets again. It was rushed and I wish I could've had a little bit more time, but I'm still grateful and elated that I got to meet them. Everybody who knows me personally and is close to me knows the love I've had for Christopher Maurice Brown since the very beginning. I also adore Trey and I'm proud of how far he's come.

I admit Chris has had his struggles and he's not perfect by any means, but he's human. A very talented human that I've followed since the very beginning. I've always found it inspiring to watch someone come from a town of 2,000 people become an international star. It was all so surreal, but I'm so glad I got to meet him and Trey. I've supported both of them since the very beginning of their careers and it's crazy how it came full circle. They're both on their sixth albums, they both came on the scene in 2005 and here we are 10 years later and they're on tour together and I got to meet them both on Valentine's Day. It was just an awesome experience and I'd do it all over again minus the Live Nation crap. They're both sweethearts and I'm grateful I got to meet them. I always thought about what would happen if I ever met them, and surprisingly I wasn't nervous at all.

Here's how the conversation went:

CB: Happy Valentine's Day! I hope you enjoy the show and I better see you turnin' up!

Me to them: I fuck with y'all! I didn't know what I was gonna say when I came in here, but I really fuck with y'all!

Trey: She really fucks with us! 


Then Christopher proceeded to high five me with both hands andddddd my life was made.

I was nervous to do a persuasive speech in public speaking class in college, but I met artists that I adore and there wasn't an ounce of nervousness in my body. Maybe it's because we're close in age and it's almost like I've grown up with them over the last 10 years through their music. Either way, it was awesome. Chris gave me a high five. With both hands. He's so freaking awesome and I wish more people saw him in that light. I'm one of the first to talk about his shortcomings, but he's extremely talented and he's brought a lot of people together. I've formed friendships with people all over the place because of him.

Who needs a valentine when you met your favorite artist and watch them perform from second row? NOT I!






The Umpteenth Health & Fitness Journey
Posted on February 3, 2015
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I'm actually going to the gym after work instead of coming home and piling up in my bed to watch 90s sitcoms on TVOne. Now, it hasn't been extremely consistent yet (two days in a row tops), but it's a start. I feel like I'm doing something. I feel bad when I eat junk, so I guess it's working. This is actually a huge step for me considering the paranoia I've felt about working out. The most I would do is walk around my complex for 30 minutes after work (in spring, of course). I'm actually taking a major step and I'm proud of myself.

I'm making it my mission to take action in 2015 and I think I'm off to a decent start. My eating habits have changed drastically since I've graduated from college, but there's always room for improvement. Exercise has been my biggest struggle, so I'm currently trying to find a routine that works for me so that I can get in the groove of things.

Pinterest and Tumblr have been my motivation and it's a good way to start your own health and fitness journey. You can literally find any and everything there; healthy recipes, workout tips, etc. Feel free to follow my Pinterest board or Tumblr page for inspiration. My random free subscription to Fitness Magazine has been pretty helpful too.

Once I get a weekly routine down and add to my workout playlist, I'll be all set. I don't plan on posting pictures on social media or anything, but I may talk about some things here or just share what I'm doing on Tumblr. Pray for me! No really, pray for me.

P.S. Spaghetti squash might be my new favorite. 

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Hi, 2015.
Posted on January 1, 2015
1 comments

I have no complaints about 2014 and I'm grateful for everything that has happened in the last 365 days, but I really want to make this year about focus, initiative, and execution. I have a good feeling about it, and I intend to follow through with my promise to myself (and my close friends so they don't cuss me out). I'm getting closer to the big 3-0 and I'm trying to cross my t's and dot my i's.

Less excuses, more effort. I've learned that if you sit idly and watch other people make moves instead of making moves of your own, you'll grow old and wonder about the shoulda coulda wouldas. I learned that lesson in 2014 and it's really time to put up or shut up. I'm feeling inspired and encouraged from all the great things that have happened to all the awesome people that I know and now is the time to make sure some of that greatness is passed my way.


I doubt that I'll be exactly where I wanna be by this time next year, but taking steps to get there is better than taking none.


I don't know where 2015 is gonna lead me, but I'm looking forward to the journey. Here's to prosperity, peace, and last but not least, happiness.


Shoot, a little travel, a little weight loss, and a few more coins ain't never hurt nobody!

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MOTC makes Twenties Unscripted's 50 Blogs to Take Into 2015
Posted on December 30, 2014
0 comments

I'm seriously humbled and honored to have been mentioned in Tyece's list and I encourage everyone to visit her blog here and check out all the other awesome women she featured. You can never have enough reading material. Go get you a piece!

P.S. Look out for some changes around here next year!

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Leave Ariana Alone!
Posted on October 18, 2014
0 comments

Ariana Grande is an amazing talent. The moment I saw her singing over a Big Pun sample, the moment I watched a video of her rendition of Emotions by none other than Queen Mariah, I was sold. The girl has pipes! Her music is awesome too, but a lot of people focus more on her appearance than her talent. She just turned 21 this summer and she got her career started on a Nickelodeon show.

I've seen a lot of people refer to her as a "little girl", and claim she needs to "grow up" before they can take her seriously solely based on the way that she dresses. 

In a society where women are scrutinized and expected to be sexy and thin, it bothers me to see other women bash Ariana for her appearance. She may not have long legs or wear a C-cup, but she's gorgeous in her own way. Ariana seems to have a sweet spirit and she's uber talented, but people skip over all of that just to talk about her appearance. Some of the very same women who preach about not appeasing the male gaze rag on Ariana's appearance; including women I know. I need all of the pots calling the kettle black to realize you contribute to the misogyny and patriarchy in today's society too. 

She's a childhood star and she's only 21, so of course she's going to explore her womanhood. God forbid any of you have daughters or sisters of your own. Everybody isn't gonna be comfortable being "sexy", so let them be! 

I would rather Ariana rock her ponytail with her crop tops and skater skirts and blow me away with her amazing voice than watch her conform for the sake of pleasing people who wouldn't support her talent anyway. 

If you're one of those women who declare, "girl power" just to turn around and downgrade women for not dressing "grown" or "sexy" enough, you're part of the problem and you might as well find a seat at the table with all the boys and men who do the same thing.

Self-esteem issues were serious when I was a kid, but these kids have it ten times worse with cyber bullying, and the pressure of wanting to grow up too fast. Ariana may serve as an inspiration to some of these kids to let them know that you can do whatever you want to do and not have to change yourself to be successful. It may sound cliche, but it's true. If you think about it, a lot of popular artists have had major success and they didn't have a seat at the "cool kids" table starting out. They just did what felt comfortable to them. 

Leave Ariana alone and worry about your own damn insecurities before you start picking other people's lives apart. Pleasantries. 

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MOTC (dot com) is three!
Posted on August 14, 2014
1 comments

It's been three years since I officially purchased this domain. I bought it the day after I graduated from college and coincidentally on my sister's 21st birthday. I was officially a college graduate and I wanted to begin my own brand and solidify that before someone else grabbed it up so I made the move and I'm glad I did. I recently thought about switching the name, but after thinking it over and talking to a couple of my fellow bloggers, I really believe MOTC represents me. 


I initially started this blog in 2010 to talk about beauty and fashion (and I still will), but it's also grown to become sort of like an online journal for me to express my thoughts and various interests. Over the past couple of weeks, I've really been thinking about my life and what I need to do to get to the next level and I really want to put my all into this little space. It may not be much compared to others' sites, but I want to utilize it to share who I am and what I'm passionate about as a 20-somethin' trying to find my way in addition to the things I enjoy.

I decided to toss the whole 'stick-to-a-niche' thing out the window long ago, because I would be doing a huge disservice to myself if I chose to limit myself to one or two things for the sake of site traffic. I love beauty and fashion, I love music, I love talking about how awesome Black women are, and I love writing even though my posts are sporadic. I want to continue to use this space as a platform for those who are like me; who may not know what they wanna do in life, who challenge traditional gender roles, or just want to rave about how awesome Beyoncé is. MOTC is my baby and I vow to take steps towards sharing and most importantly, growing as a brand and as a woman.

I wanna a give a shoutout and thank you to my fellow blogger friends who read my sporadic posts, encourage me and most of all in believe me. Yetti, Kimberly, Shenequa and Tyece, you girls are everything. I aspire to be as awesome as the four of you. 

And last but not least, a big thank you to everyone whose ever read a post, commented, or anything. Your support is everything and it really does keep me motivated when I feel like throwing in the towel. 

I wouldn't call this 'blogaversary' a celebration, it's more of a reflection for me. I just hope my 4th, 5th, and so on will be one for the books.


Here's to celebratory blogaversaries in the future!

- Jai <3 font="" nbsp="">

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"You got the look the Gods agree they wanna see..."
Posted on July 30, 2014
0 comments

This song is important. The video is even more important. I'm so glad we finally got a visual for this song. It oozes Girl Power/Black Girl Anthem. Only thing that was missing was Solo, but I still love it.  The fact that she paid homage to HBCU culture, Janelle's hair, the T.I. cameo... LOVE!


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Why Cohabitation Ain't For Me
Posted on July 23, 2014
0 comments

Cohabitation isn’t a foreign concept. It’s been going on for generations. Some refer to it as “playing house”, others like to call it “shacking up”. I call it a “Hell Nah” and here’s why.

I’m an introvert and I like being alone. A lot. I enjoy getting together with my friends every now and then and my weekend shopping trips with my mom, but I like my alone time. I need my space. I enjoy lounging in my pajamas, watching Golden Girls on DVD or having an impromptu jam session, party of one.  

I hate when people touch my belongings without my permission. I like when things are done a certain way, but most of all, I don’t deal well with uncertainty.

I’ve never been the type to leap into anything haphazardly. I like to go with the flow, but I also like to plan. Until I’ve met “the one” and we’ve known each other for some time and plan on being married, I can’t ever see myself living with my future significant other.

It has nothing to do with religious beliefs and everything to do with privacy and security. Some people live together because it works for them and their relationship while others do it for the sake of getting help with the bills. If the relationship doesn’t work out, then what happens? If Ricky can’t come up with his part of the rent, what am I supposed to do?

I’d like to think I’m a modern-day woman with an open mind, but that’s one thing I can’t get down with. It’s just not for me. I realize no relationship is perfect, but that’s not a risk I’m willing to take. Sorry, not sorry.

One's living arrangement is none of business if it doesn't pertain to my own, but I personally can't see myself splitting the bills with someone unless marriage is involved. 

At this point, I don't even want a roommate if I can help it. I did it in college for two and half years and that was enough. I would prefer my own space to do what I want and not have to consider someone else's feelings or preferences. Once I move out on my own, I’ll know for sure that bills or paid or if I’m craving a bowl of Talenti gelato when I get home from work, it’ll be in the freezer where I left it.

It almost reminds me of the days I shared a room with my sister when we were kids and I absolutely hated that. There’s nothing like being alone in my own space. On those rainy fall nights, I like to sit in the dark with my window up, burn a pineapple mango candle, put my iPod on shuffle and chill. No worries, no interruptions.

God forbid I ever get married, I don’t know what I’m gonna do then. In the meantime, I’ll just enjoy my candle collections, iPod on shuffle and Golden Girls DVD collection.


Do you live with your significant other or are you contemplating moving in together? How does it work for you and your relationship? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

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Just a 20-somethin' trying to find my way and be great.
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